Smoothing Sharp Edges
Our final sanctuary (the strange, checkerboard-painted basement bedroom that we’ve been using as a living room these past many weeks) has fallen. It’s been a long time coming, but I didn’t know that it would happen TODAY - so, as it is, I’m now sitting cross-legged on the bed upstairs, surrounded by dogs and furniture and pantry goods and all the other bits and pieces that we simply had to get out of the way in order for the guys to do their jobs.
Like all the demo that’s happened here, it’s making way for something new - in this case, a geothermal heating and cooling system. Along with being extra-efficient (as it uses the heat stored in the earth to warm or chill the air) it’s also going to help us solve two very specific problems.
The first is that the only propane provider available to us here is a real jerk. Like, a REAL jerk. We currently rely on propane for our heat and hot water and last winter we could not get them to come fill our tank. After weeks of trying to get ahold of them (calls, emails, and a trip Eric made down to the headquarters building where he stood outside the locked and blacked-out front door until he caught someone coming out and basically FORCED them to put us on the schedule) they finally did their job. And not a moment too soon - we were in the depths of a cold snap, the tank was at 5%, and we’d been rationing heat and hot water for days. I’m just not interested in playing that game again.
The second is that, after moving our lives to this grass-filled and surrounded plot, we discovered that Eric has horrendous grass allergies. Since June, he’s been battling a runny nose and sore throat and bloodshot, itchy eyes without relief. Obviously it’s a problem every time we go outside - and maybe that would be somewhat tolerable if inside were any better. But it’s not. The only way to cool the house down right now is to open windows at night - so he gets no respite and no rest.
The new system should help solve this.
Because it’s forced air, instead of radiators like the propane system, we can hook it all up to a HEPA filter and remove all sorts of allergens before air ever even comes into the house. And because it’s going to provide cooling as well as heating, we can keep the windows closed and all that grassy pollen out at night during the summer. The dogs will need wipe-downs after ever romp and I will never again be able to go feed the horses in my pajamas (gotta keep those pj’s pollen free!) but next summer should be better.
Anyhow - I guess all of this to say that I had a mini panic moment this morning, feeling like I was being ousted from my last little hiding place…but now I’m feeling again like it’s all worth it. Plus, the demo revealed some scribblings beneath the drywall and a hidey-hole of mini alcohol bottles - so we’ve been laughing all day, imagining one of the kids who lived here before sneaking a taste and stashing the evidence.
The kitchen/living/dining space is coming together a little like this…
I have forgotten what it feels like to walk across the floor with bare feet and not cringe in revulsion at the grit that sticks to my soles. Having the fridge plugged into an extension cord so it can move out of the way at any given moment has become the new normal. Primer and paint and drywall dust are my constant accessories. “Finished” is a very distant milestone, but it’s coming together and it’s going to be GOOD. I don’t want to pat my own back too early, but I should have gone into interior design!
My mom sent me this podcast last week - and while, after listening to it, I kept thinking about my metalsmithing professor in college telling us to turn off our phones so we couldn’t get pinged or texted or notified during studio time, the thing that stuck with me most was this idea that humans can really only do two, maybe three things at a time.
I don’t want to believe this, because I want to be able to do about TWELVE things at any given moment - but I can’t help but see the truth in it. Right now, I HAVE TO take care of my animals, keep the trees/garden alive, and keep this house project rolling (aka, be available to make decisions, do the nightly homework, endlessly shuffle our stuff to keep the next workspace free and clear, etc) - and after accomplishing those tasks, it’s usually time to eat dinner and go to bed, which we now do by 9pm at the latest like the little old people we are. Anything beyond those have-to-do’s currently gets snuck into the rare, spare moments that sometimes just appear like magic.
Like writing these words. Like spending a few minutes working on a handful of rings that should have taken me a week but will probably end up taking three.
This summer has me feeling like a chunk of stone tossed in the river. It’s been uncomfortable, but where did I think all those round edges came from? They certainly weren’t a result of sitting still and safe, locked deep in the soil. I’ll be the first to admit that I’ve still got plenty of sharp points, rough patches, jagged edges - but overall I’d say I’m getting a little smoother. Taking on a softer form. Wearing down, but not in a bad way.
